Vantage Men

Program 10 of 10 · From Dating to a Relationship

Dates are easy for you now. Keeping it going is not.

Three months in it went flat, and neither of you could say why. You still think about her sometimes.

Choosing well, saying what you want out loud, and building the daily closeness that makes a relationship last.

Start tonight, from $37Is this me?
  • 5 modules
  • 8 lessons
  • 8 exercises
  • 9 curated resources
  • 30-day guarantee

Is this you?

You will recognise at least one of these.

You can get dates but relationships fizzle after a few months
You are unsure when and how to have the 'what are we' conversation
Your last relationship went flat and you do not know why
You want a partnership that keeps desire and respect alive

On the other side

What changes when you do the work

Getting dates is one skill; building a relationship that stays exciting is another. This program covers choosing the right partner, the conversation that makes it official, the research-backed habits that keep couples close (Gottman's bids, Perel's desire), handling conflict without contempt, and maintaining your own life so the relationship stays attractive to both of you.

After the program

A partner-selection framework based on long-term research, not infatuation

After the program

A calm, clear way to define the relationship

After the program

The daily habits that predict lasting closeness

After the program

A conflict approach that avoids the four behaviours that predict break-ups

After the program

A plan for keeping desire alive without games

The path

5 modules, in the order that works

  1. 1Choosing well

    Attraction gets you to the door. Character, consistency and secure functioning decide whether it lasts.

    The long-term checklistSecure functioning
  2. 2Defining the relationship

    Clarity is attractive. Ambiguity breeds anxiety on both sides.

    When and how
  3. 3Keeping close: bids and rituals

    Gottman's research: couples who stay together turn toward each other's small bids for attention most of the time.

    Turning towardRituals
  4. 4Conflict without contempt

    Gottman's four horsemen predict break-ups: criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. Each has an antidote.

    The four and their antidotes
  5. 5Keeping desire alive

    Perel: love wants closeness; desire wants space. You need both.

    Separateness and seeing her anewInitiative and novelty

The learning library

The best of what exists, already sorted

9 hand-picked videos, books, articles, research papers and tools, each with a note on what to take from it. The links are in the workbook.

bookThe Seven Principles for Making Marriage WorkJohn Gottman and Nan Silver (book)
articleThe Seven Principles, summarisedShortform
talkThe secret to desire in a long-term relationshipEsther Perel, TED
bookAttached: secure functioningLevine and Heller (book)
talkHow to fall in love, according to Hinge's relationship scientistNPR interview with Logan Ury
videoGottman's four horsemen explainedYouTube search
videoBids for connection explainedYouTube search
videoEsther Perel on keeping desire aliveYouTube search
researchWomen rate kindness the most attractive traitThe Healthy

Exercises and scripts

Things you will actually do this week

8 step-by-step exercises with time estimates. Full instructions are in the workbook; the tag shows the tier where each one unlocks.

Long-term scorecard · 20 minStarter and up
Past relationship autopsy · 30 minStarter and up
Bids week · 5 minStarter and up
The DTR script · 10 minStarter and up
Rituals design · 20 minComplete and up
Gentle start-up practice · 15 minComplete and up
Own-life audit · 20 minComplete and up
Coach relationship review · 60 minUltra

4 scripts in the Complete and Ultra workbooks, plus all 33 across every program in the Scripts and Templates Pack.

Proof, not vibes

The eight things you will measure

Score each 1–5 before you start, at day 15 and at the end. The workbook has the scoring sheet. You will see the number move.

Selection1: Chemistry decides5: Character and consistency decide
Clarity1: Months of ambiguity5: Defined calmly at the right time
Turning toward bids1: Phone wins5: I respond to the small things
Rituals1: None5: Weekly, daily, monthly in place
Conflict: criticism and contempt1: 'You always', eye-rolls5: Gentle start-up, appreciation
Conflict: defensiveness and stonewalling1: Counter-attack or shut down5: Own my part, timed breaks
Own life1: Dissolved into the relationship5: Friends, craft, training kept
Desire and initiative1: Passive, routine5: I plan, surprise, flirt

Start tonight

How far do you want to take it?

Instant download after payment. Secure checkout by Stripe. 30-day money-back guarantee on every tier.

Starter

Learn the fundamentals and get moving in 7 days

$37 one-time

  • Core workbook (PDF): lessons, key ideas, mistakes to avoid
  • Curated learning library with links to videos, books and research
  • 7-day action plan
  • Before / during / after self-assessment matrix
  • Starter exercises
Most popular

Complete

The full 30-day program with every exercise and script

$147$97 one-time

  • Everything in Starter
  • Full 30-day program, week by week
  • All exercises, including the advanced ones
  • Scripts, templates and message frameworks
  • Weekly review template and progress tracker
  • 30 days of email Q&A with your coach

Ultra

Complete plus personal coaching and a 90-day path

$497$297 one-time

  • Everything in Complete
  • 90-day mastery path with monthly milestones
  • One private 60-minute coaching call
  • Personal written review of your situation, profile or messages
  • Six fortnightly accountability check-ins by email
  • Lifetime updates to the workbook

Prices in USD. Taxes may apply at checkout. Digital content is delivered immediately; by purchasing you agree to the terms and refund policy.

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